Friday, May 20, 2011

Lost - Romantic Friday Writers

Link to Romantic Friday Writers
If you haven't heard of the Romantic Friday Writers then you're in for a treat. Every Friday, we post on a common theme. You can access the other member's posts either by clicking the picture of the rose above or the badge on my sidebar.  Its easy to join if you'd like to participate too!

This week's theme is 'Lost' and I'm so excited to post an excerpt  of my newest work, the Gothic Romance, Whispers on Shadow Bay.

We meet Rosetta who is lost in every possible way, both figuratively and emotionally. Running from a tragic crumbling of her life in sunny California, she finds herself in the dark forests. A little known island off the coast of Washington State, Noble Island is a place where dangerous mysteries, dark secrets, and deep romance reside.

Chapter One
I stared out the windshield at the gnarled branches scratching through the thick fog. The black iron gate before me rose in jagged spires against the dusky sky, forbidding and stark in the sea of lush green foliage. I sank deeper into the seat of the leased sedan and chewed on a fingernail. This was my last chance to change my mind. I could still turn around, leave this dark and soggy forest, and fly back to the beaches of California. I told myself this even though I knew it wasn’t possible. My thumb went to my finger, to twirl the engagement ring that was no longer there and I stopped myself with a ragged breath.
Don’t let me fall apart again, Lord. Help me have faith that despite all that’s happened, You’re there for me.
“Keep it together, Rose.” I whispered. My hand went to the polished mahogany box on the passenger seat, the smooth wood comforting under my palm. “This can be a good thing if you let it.”
I’d flown the length of the pacific shore to this little known island off the coast of Washington as if distance from my home would lessen the heaviness in my heart. Taking a steadying breath, I rolled forward, gravel crunching underneath the tires, and drove up to the metal intercom box standing off the path. Rolling down my window, a cold mist blew in my face and I gasped.
Numbered buttons, yellowed and cracked with age, butted up against a round speaker. A tingle of worry raced through me. Am I supposed to know some sort of code? Reaching into my purse, I pulled out the folded acceptance letter. I scanned it, re-read the conditions of my employment, and sighed. Nothing. I glanced back at the keypad and bit my lip, thinking. Grey mist swirled around the metal pole of the speaker, a slow eddy of fog that sent me shivering in the lightweight coat.
“Don’t work,” a voice crackled behind me and I yelped.
A man, white-haired and crouched with age leaned on a shovel near the rear fender. His long brown coat, tweed hat, and black galoshes made him look like he belonged on the English moors.
“W-What?” I put my hand over my racing heart.
“Been broke for years,” he said in a thick Irish brogue and raised a shaking finger to the speaker.
Forcing a smile, I unbuckled and pulled myself from the warm car to face him.
“My name’s Rosetta Ryan. I’m here for the care-giver’s position. Mrs. Tuttle hired me.” I held out a hand. The stranger glanced at it and then back at my face without moving. Clearing my throat, I looked down at the acceptance letter in my other hand wondering if he really was scowling or just really wrinkly.
“Name’s O’Shay,” The old man said. Raising a bushy white brow, he shook his head. “And you don’t look like a Carl to me.”

Well that's it for my excerpt.  I hope to share more later. 

I encourage you to hop on over to the Romantic Friday Writers and take a peek at the pieces of flash fiction, excerpts, poems and other offerings. 

Hope you have a wonderful weekend!  
Until next time...Go Write!


Margo Benson said...

Oh my! I have to read the whole book now. I felt her loss and her solitude and already hope there is true love for her on the island.
The title is wonderful.

N. R. Williams said...

Brilliant first line and many others as well. Great writing as Margo said, I think I must read the story.
N. R. Williams, The Treasures of Carmelidrium

Roland D. Yeomans said...

You drew us into her pain, loneliness, yet stubborn refusal to give into both. We find ourselves rooting for her even as we are apprehensive for her and new employment. Great job, Roland

Francine Howarth said...


For me, the opening lines were perfect! They set the scene, impart sinister element...

I stared out the windshield at the gnarled branches scratching through the thick fog. The black iron gate before me rose in jagged spires against the dusky sky, forbidding and stark in the sea of lush green foliage ...

And, that's why all those damn writing gurus out there who say start with dialogue really wind me up. Brief description can make a book where dialogue often leaves a reader wanting to know where in hell the MCs are before they start yapping! ;)


Anonymous said...

First paragraph beautifully sets the scene. A dark forest. A broken engagement. And an intriguing old man.

Well done, Raquel. Now I want to read the rest of the story.
Ann Best, Memoir Author

J.L. Campbell said...

Hmmm...Is Rosetta lost or does the old man have things twisted? Your description nicely sets the tone for what's happening in Rosetta's life.

L'Aussie said...

Rosetta's travails fit the Lost theme perfectly, Raquel. This has a wonderfully mystic feel to it. Love your descriptions. They resonate well throughtout the excerpt.

Thank you for participating. It is truly wonderful reading stories of this calibre.

Hope the Purple Knot tour is going well. I must pop by when I have a minute.


Raquel Byrnes said...

Thank you guys for your kind words and encouragement. I had a great time visiting all of your blogs and reading the excerpts. Fun time!

Francine Howarth said...


Just a little add-on: you've been tagged! See my blog. ;)


Libby said...

I love love love the ending. What an odd situation to find yourself in and I love that it starts with a reminder of a date she has with Ben. So far, I'm pretty intrigued.

Madeleine said...

Sexual tension. Delicious :O)