Friday, April 8, 2011

Beware of The Geek Factor! - "G"



I've spent the past few days writing about different genres where magic/supernatural occurrences are a required part of the story.  But its not all fairies and vampires out there. There are some genres that have a different type of 'magic' its called forensics or...the Geek Factor.


Ever since I've learned about these wily, white-coated, superheroes, I've been too paranoid to commit any sort of crime because I might shed a single hair that has a skin tag. Apparently, the crime scene guys from the FBI or the CIA or just a really wealthy city can take that hair and scan it with flashy blue lights to get instant DNA.  


Never mind that it takes weeks - yes weeks - for real DNA typing or that you need a sample to compare it to.  That's all boring.


In this universe, they'll analyze that DNA and give the genetic marker information to a really sexy-looking artist/computer program writer and she'll use weird hologram smoke to reconstruct my face out of guesses and suppositions.


That picture will go to a super-secret, underground, classified, black-ops, think-tank where more be-speckled/pasty guys will use facial recognition software to infiltrate traffic cams, bank machines, and my very own laptop camera to track my every move. But they're just getting started...


My information will then go onto another department belonging to a guy with a weird sunglass fetish. This lab is where someone will put a section of said hair in a tiny bottle spinner-thingy and figure out my favorite color and whether or not I cheat on my taxes.


But that's not all! Oh, no!  There's apparently a really smart/insane guy they keep in the bowels of Harvard. He and his truly magnificent son ----->
will concoct some elaborate quasi-steam punk-ish contraption that will bend time so that they can actually 'see' my crime.


Then, they'd track my movements via aerial robotic camera drones...controlled by more said 'lab geek factor' technicians while their SUV-driving goons pull some sort of vehicular insanity to run me off the road and take me into custody.


Finally I'll be made to sit in a glassed-in room with a very angry Irish guy who can tell if I'm lying just by the way my nostrils flare.  I'd be convicted in an instant.


The Lab Geek Factor...don't mess with it, people.


All kidding aside, there are some really great sites out there to help you incorporate reality-based forensics in your crime or suspense novel. 


Fellow Blogger, Clarissa Draper has the most awesome series on evidence gathering and the like. Check her out, she's amazing.


A couple of other sites for learning about forensics and crime procedures are: Forensics blogs and  Top 50 Criminal Justice Blogs.

Until next time...Go Write!

This post brought to you by A-Z April Blogging Challenge.
Photograph by Vince Alongi.